The Red Sox have developed a new form of personal torture and that is watching a Rick Porcello start.
I would rather listen to a lecture from my spouse on how to correctly load the dishwasher or sins of washing colors with whites. I would rather field endless calls from “Heather” from Cardholders Services than witness a Porcello blowout.
The latest was watching the early fireworks on Canada Day provided by the incendiary pitching of Porcello. The stat line for the latest was two innings and seven runs. Of course, there is a specialty. The Parker House in Boston the specialty is Boston cream pie. For Porcello it is getting creamed via the home run. Three in his latest debacle.
So why run the numbers for the season? I went to fangraphs and had to attest to being 18-years-old before I was allowed to examine the X rated stats of Porcello.
So my shrill whine – as one of many that reverberates around RSN – is meaningless without a solution. The solution is simple – don’t give him the ball and said sphere will not exit the playing field.
This would actually mean a profiles in courage for whomever is the ringmaster for the Fenway circus. Does manager John Farrell have any input? Does Ben Cherington? Does approval come from Henry et al?
The Red Sox have an investment of over 100M in the 26-year-old right-hander. There is nothing in his illustrious pitching history that even gives a speck of insight that he could be this bad. All this does is bring back memories of John Lackey – who, as later evidence would show – pitched with an arm held together by frayed remains. Is Porcello in a similar situation?
If so, Rick, shut it down! If not we can go to step number two and that is Justin Masterson.
Masterson was gifted 9.5M from the overflowing and generous coffers of The Boston American League franchise. Masterson accepted this offer and promptly became arguably the worse tosser in the American League and probably Korean baseball, the Mexican League and every backyard wiffle ball league in North American.
Masterson suddenly developed a “shoulder strain” or the Red Sox version of the “Hellenic Flu,” long employed by the Boston Celtics to alleviate roster problems. And the recovery of Masterson has been encouraging with his five inning and one run effort. A mental health month. Why not? May have worked for Masterson.
So – just maybe – management needs to speak to Porcello and encourage a shutdown for safety reason. Someone is going to seriously be hurt by a home run ball.
Meanwhile sitting in Pawucket is 24-year-old left-hander Brian Johnson. Leading the International League in pitching wins (8), fourth in ERA (2.68) and tops in WHIP (1.08). Johnson has thrown 80.2 innings with 76 strikeouts and 24 walks. Put him in for Porcello and see what happens – it can’t possibly be any more of a disaster.
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