Bobby Valentine-It’s a Wrap

Now that the manager situation has been settled, albeit messily, I think it is time to say, “it is what it is”, and cease the carping and whining his selection evoked. I know Boston is tough on it’s sports teams, but God’s sake, give the man a chance. He came out of his initial press conference, having not only passed with flying colors, but also shinier than before.

The boy is a charmer, that’s for sure. He also hit the ground running, heading to the Dominican Republic to have an audience with the David Ortiz (you wonder if Bobby would have traveled that quickly if Papi lived some frozen tundra instead of the Caribbean).  I can’t help it , cynicism thy name is Smith. The trip was an apparent success, lots of smiles and photo ops, but no hard news about a multi year contract for a 36 year old  DH. I guess Papi’s ideal choice for going to his great reward is with bat at the ready, just having spit on his gloved hands with the residents’ bus from Old Players Who Did Not Know When to Quit”  Assisted Living Plaza waiting to take him back for Bingo (after they stopped and picked up Tim Wakefield) Valentine, making the rounds made sure that Papi knew he was loved, he moved on to other good will visits. There is no doubt he is a good manager, but can his evil twin let him manage? That remains to be seen, but let’s wish him well and give him all the support we can.

In reading about Valentine, trying to get a little insight into him beyond the baseball diamond I came across the startling claim that he, Robert John Valentine, invented the now universally accepted wrap sandwich. This is a serious matter and not be taken lightly. I then decided I would investigate the provenance of the wrap sandwich and let the facts fall where they may.  If Mr. Valentine gets caught in mouth overload for which he is known, so be i, if not, then give credit where is credit is due.

I am from Virginia and I know full well the importance of who started what. The stew known as Brunswick Stew was created and first served, in 1828,  in Brunswick County, Virginia-thus the catchy name. Our advertising budget wasn’t so big back then. Now not being able to copyright a stew, it wasn’t long until a usurper from Brunswick County, Georgia claimed the stew was first served there in 1898. It is important to note at this point that Georgia was originally  populated by criminals, barbarians and bedwetters; whereas as Virginia was the land of presidents and authors of our most precious proclamations of freedom. Credibility is a no-brainer. The honor and dignity of the great Commonwealth crushed the pretender.  Don’t get me started on the First Thanksgiving.

So I know the importance of establishing accuracy and authenticity to claims of gastronomic significance, and at the risk of clouding the credibility of our new fearless leader, I began a quest for the truth. According to Mr. Valentine, he was working his restaurant, The Bobby Valentine Sports Gallery Cafe in Stamford, CT.The ran out of  regular bread so started rolling the sandwich makings in tortillas. These were not tacos or burritos. These were BLTs, Turkey Sandwiches and other traditional sandwiches with nary a jalapeno or tostada in the house. The first wrap sandwich was proudly served in Bobby’s restaurant by Beth Dolan, a waitress at the restaurant. This fate of this brave pioneer is unknown, but we owe her a huge debt of gratitude for the delivery of this heretofore unseen and untasted delight to an unsuspecting but grateful customer; l alas, the identity of this customer is lost, but the sandwich became a hit and the rest, gentle reader, is history.  As Mr. Valentine so eloquently said  “Well, that’s legend and folklore, but until somebody disputes me or comes up with a better story, I’ll say I invented the wrap.”

Well folks, no such dispute or better story has appeared. One final confirmation of Mr. Valentine’s claim is that his creation has a Japanese kongi or character which forms a sign for a wrap and over it, the symbol for the number 2. Mr. Valentine,  a highly popular manager in Japan, had the number 2 at his uniform number.  That cements the origin of the wrap. Who else to you know that has an alphabetical character chronicling his exploits. The Gordian knot has been severed.

So, ye of little faith, celebrate the new manager of the Red Sox; celebrate his wisdom and baseball excellence. But also know that in addition to these secondary talents, we have in our midst, the inventor of the world famous wrap sandwich.  We are in the presence of genius.

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